How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Helps Women Find the Love of Their Life: Relationship Coach Make-Over Tips

How to become a relationship coach who helps married women find the love of their life might seem to be the biggest challenge in the world. If 40% of married women cheat on their husbands, 60% of married men cheat on their wives, and over half of marriages in the U.S. fail, it seems that every marriage could benefit from a relationship coach make-over. If you’re wondering how to become a relationship coach who helps women get the love they need, you’re looking into a great niche. Many a relationship coach don’t have the guts to lay it on the line and be up front about what it takes to have a great relationship. They would rather listen and be a “good friend” than risk loosing rapport. But in order to be effective, you have to learn how to become a relationship coach that knows how to balance compassion and tough love.

How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Has Courage

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First of all, you need to become a relationship coach who is able to quote someone well respected and successful, like Zig Ziglar. He says, “You can have everything you want, if you will just help enough other people get what they want.” It’s hard to argue with that one! This is a strategy that is time tested and proven; just not necessarily in relationship coach circles.

But what’s the secret to how to become a relationship coach who translates Zig’s quote into a relationship coach make-over tip? Simply put, but not popular, you need to give before you can expect to get something back. Someone once said, “If you want a friend, be a friend,” but I haven’t heard, “If you want a loving spouse, be a loving spouse.” Yet, how often do people complain about their spouses to their friends and to their loved ones?

How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Means Business

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The secret to how to become a relationship coach who helps turn around relationships is to help your clients apply good business sense to their marriages. Have them get to know the needs of their customer, or spouse. Have them focus on helping their husband get what he needs instead of demanding what they want. As a relationship coach you know that making demands doesn’t work in sales, and you find that it doesn’t work in marriages, either.

Be a Relationship Coach that Adds Value

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When your relationship coach clients start looking at how to add value to their spouses and their relationships, they will find a much more receptive environment. Sometimes the secret to how to become a relationship coach who helps women get the love they want is to get them to stop complaining and waiting for something to change. Empower your clients to make a difference in their own life and stop making excuses why they can’t have what they want. It’s likely to be right under their nose – they just need a relationship coach to point it out to them.

Colette Seymann
JTS Advisors Bi-Designated Strategy and Accountability Coach

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How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Avoids the Greatest Relationship Coach Nightmare: The Easy Way and the Hard Way

The path becoming a relationship coach seems easy at first glance.  Everyone has relationships that they struggle with.  But the real problem is how to become a relationship coach when you have skeletons in your own closet.  What if your clients find out?  Will your relationship coach certification be invalid if you severe your relationship with your brother?  Fortunately, there is a way to learn how to become a relationship coach despite your own relationship challenges.

How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Knows What is at Stake

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Let’s face it, when someone threatens to take away one or more of our basic needs we’ll do what we need to do to protect it.  For example:  You decide to practice your relationship coach technology on your sister, and instead of coming closer to you she retreats into her shell.  You feel a loss of love and connection.  If she says, “This is stupid” then you may loose significance and might wonder how to become a relationship coach.  It is key to realize that whatever is going on, is going on between your own ears.

How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Listens Instead of Reacts

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And what happens when we feel hurt or threatened?  We react.  You might retreat into the safety of your tortoise shell or you might lift your tail like a skunk and make a big stink.  But if you keep your relationship coach cap on, and think about the steps you’ve taken towards how to become a relationship coach, then truly listen with the intent to understand, you have a chance to transform the relationship.  If you’re waiting for the other person to go first, chances are you’ve missed their attempt or they’re waiting for you to go first.

How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Gives Feedback

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Now is your chance to be the relationship coach with your mom and tell her what’s wrong with her…right?  Wrong!  Giving feedback means feeding back what you’ve heard the other person say, so they feel understood, this essential when pondering how to become a relationship coach.  Ask for confirmation that you’ve interpreted their message correctly.  That’s it!

How Become a Relationship Coach Who Owns Their Part and Accepts Responsibility for Providing the Solution

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If you’re not screaming, “That’s not fair!” by now, you’re not in enough pain to change.  You are the only one who has the power to transform your relationships, and your career as a relationship coach hinges on this concept.  You don’t need to grovel, or beg, or be fake.  In fact, those are the things that probably got you into the relationship mess you’re in.  It may be as simple as simply saying, “I thought…” or “I interpreted that as…” or “I felt…” and then “I know that wasn’t your intent.”

Just because you’re a relationship coach doesn’t mean you have to be successful in all your relationships.  When you can have an authentic conversation with a loved one, you may feel that you run the risk of loosing it all.  But in that moment you become a relationship coach who walks their talk.

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Bi-Designated Strategy and Accountability Coach

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Relationship Coach Training Boot Camp Basics:   How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Understands Masculine and Feminine Polarity

How to Become a Relationship Coach That Can Implement Relationship Coach Tools to Increase Polarity | Image by timcourtois-wordpress

Relationship Coach Basics: Male and Female Polarity

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You don’t have to be a relationship coach or a physics professor to know that opposites attract.  However, the first step in how to become a relationship coach is to completely understand the difference between masculine and feminine polarity.  One of the biggest problems a relationship faces over time is the loss of polarity. As man and woman become more similar, the attraction diminishes, and what was once exciting becomes dull.  But, a good relationship coach teaches couples that it doesn’t have to be that way.  Here’s how to become a relationship coach who understands the cause and the solution.

Three Steps that Demonstrate How to Become a Relationship Coach that Helps Couples Find Excitement in Their Relationship

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Step 1:  How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Understands Masculine Energy.

Masculine energy is about directed force.  Think about our hunter/gather ancestors.  The men went out with their spears, stalked their prey, and used all their energy to throw their spears to make a kill and bring home food.  The masculine man is all about getting that ultimate “touchdown” in whatever form that is.  He is signficance driven.  He wants power and to see that power grow.  This is the male “ego.”  He is also certainty driven.  Like an immovable rock, he wants to be centered and solid.  A relationship coach understands that without masculine energy, feminine energy is diminished.

Step 2:  How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Understands Feminine Energy.

Feminine energy is also about power, although her type of power is not as focused.  It is much more flowing and free.  When a woman with this type of energy walks into a room, it effects the whole room.  The feminine side of a woman is driven by love, connnection and variety.  While masculine energy is centered, feminine energy is stormy and exciting.  This is drive for variety is why woman get bored easily, and it is what allows them to multi-task.  Women have all this freedom, but are looking for some contraints that create certainty.  A relationship coach knows that this is why she looked for a relationship in the first place.

Step 3:  How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Understands the Need for Polarity.

What often happens when a man and woman unite is that the man tries to solve a woman’s problems when she really just wants to connect.  Sometimes a man will actually try to impose his own masculine style on a woman’s style, resulting in a solution to one problem but creating it’s own.  When a woman gets praise for becoming more masculine in her approach, she tends to loose some of her feminine energy.  This also can happen in reverse.  A woman might chip away at that tough masculine shell over time, causing him to soften and become more feminine.  As their differences become more narrow, the natural exciting polarity that once brought them together starts to fade.

As a Relationship Coach it is Your Job to Help Your Client Re-Discover Polarity

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The key to become a relationship coach who can bring back the sparks in a relationship is to help couples respect and relate to each other’s primary masculine or feminine traits.  While it’s true that no one is completely masculine or feminine, without these differences relationships become friendships.  But as a relationship coach, you know that it doesn’t have to be so.  With proper care, that spark can last a lifetime.

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Designated Accountability Coach

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Dating Coach Training That Will Help You Learn How to Become a Relationship Coach

How to become a relationship coach seems easier if you start from the beginning, and this dating coach training is designed to give you a few key places to get started.  Most people enter into a relationship to fill a need for companionship, and when things start falling apart they wonder why.  The key is how to become a relationship coach who can bring back the spark into a relationship; even if they fire has died down a long time ago.  This dating coach training can help people in most phases of their relationships, even if they feel all hope is lost.

Dating Coach Training Tip #1: How to Become a Relationship Coach Who is Cautious

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The first step in how to become a relationship coach who brings back the magic into relationships is to be aware of the power of the initial attraction stage.  During this stage people invest a lot of time and energy into the other person.  They put their best face forward, and life is beautiful.  They’re patient, understanding, and will do anything for the other person.  The dating coach training for couples in this stage is to proceed with caution.

Dating Coach Training Tip #2: How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Can Feel the Love

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But of course, they won’t and will end up in the next stage.  This is the stage where the answer to “how to become a relationship coach?” seems easy because there is a problem now!  And the dating coach training for this stage is related to the mortality of the first stage.  Who can keep up the all that giving of time and resources for one person when the rest of their life starts demanding attention?  This is where the honeymoon ends.  But does it have to end?

The key is to learn how to become a relationship coach who can discover what happened to that loving feeling.  The short answer is that initially each person was receiving love in a way they understood.  Not necessarily by design, but because each person was just throwing out love in as many different ways as they could think of.  There are 3 types of communication you want to learn from this dating coach training:

  • Audio: These people may want to hear the words, “I love you.”
  • Visual: These people may want to see that the other person loves them.  This can happen when they receive gifts, or the other person does something for them, etc.
  • Kinesthetic: These people life to feel that the other person loves them.  They like to be touched; ie. holding hands, kissing, foot massages.

The key to how to become a relationship coach who can help couples fall back in love again, is to help each person understand how their partner experiences love in terms of these 3 types of communication.  Having this dating coach training as a resource in the beginning could have saved a lot of anguish, but I’ve seen this work with people who have been married 20 years.  Once one or both partners learn to express love in terms that are most naturally received, a shift in the relationship occurs.    This “focused” love communication is a very effective tool in helping people reconnect, and you can feel good about making a difference in the world.

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Accountability Coach

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How to Become a relationship Coach: How to Get Life Coach Clients to Passionate Relationships

 

When a new coach is asking me how to become a relationship coach, one question they ask me is, “Do I have to tell a couple to ‘break up’?”  We’ll that’s a simple answer… At times, YES, if you’re going to be worth your life coach salary, you’ll need to advise clients to break off their relationship sometimes.  You may need to learn how to get life coach clients to split up!  When you learn how to become a relationship coach, you’ll realize that you’ll actually need to do that for a variety of reasons.

When you’re thinking of how to become a relationship coach, you need to sacrifice some of the taboos that you may have about relationships.  Do you think that as long as a relationship isn’t abusive that the couple should always stay together and work things out?  Why?  Do you think that being alone is ‘bad’?  When coaching clients are having trouble in relationships, do you always think about how to get life coach clients back together?  Also, perhaps you perceive that any time there is dis-agreement in a relationship that there’s something wrong or someone to blame.  

Learning How to Become a Relationship Coach in a Modern World

 

In modern relationships, people decide on what they’re going to do based upon preference.  Most relationships are no longer ‘arranged’ and most women don’t have to marry a man simply because he has money or power.  That means that many of the old ideas about how relationships work or don’t work have to change along with those circumstances.  Part of how to become a relationship coach is learning how to get life coach clients to make major changes in their ‘relationship expectations’.

How to Get Life Coach Clients to Understand The Game Has Changed

 

Help your clients to realize that they have a choice.  Learn how to get life coach clients to think of their life without that particular relationship.  It doesn’t mean that they’ve got to break up and that it’s the ‘only choice’ but when your life coaching client stops making that choice ‘wrong’ then they can really feel free to decide which way they REALLY want to go rather than just living in reaction.  Sometimes, you’ll tell a couple to ‘break up’ and then they will actually grow closer together as a result.  Learn how to become a relationship coach that can learn how to get life coach clients to produce that result.  Your coaching clients will actually convince themselves to love each other more when you challenge their relationship.  

Jeffrey T. Sooey

CEO, JTS Advisors

Founder, Coaches Training Blog community

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Coaching Careers: How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Brings Back The Magic

 

Are coaching careers more fulfilling than –say- the career of a divorce attorney?  Can you learn anything about how to become a relationship coach from divorce attorneys? I guess it depends on how you look at things but learning is everywhere, right? 

 

How To Become a Relationship Coach – A Divorce Attorney’s Story of Coaching Careers


Here’s a story about one divorce attorney who – while not committed to coaching careers knows how to become a relationship coach.

A woman walks into the office of a divorce attorney, and says she wants to divorce her husband and totally destroy him in the porcess.

“Great!” the attorney says. “Go home and make him fall in love with you more deeply than he ever has before.  When you leave him, he will be devastated.”

So the woman returns in a month, saying she has done what the attorney has advised.  He responds, “Ok, now we can file the divorce papers.” “Are you crazy!” the woman replies. “I would never leave him. He’s the most loving and generous man I’ve ever Known.”

Clearly this attorney was not focused on coaching careers but knew the secret of how to become a relationship coach.

Coaching Careers; How to Become a Relationship Coach 101

 

How to become a relationship coach is one thing. Being a great one comes from knowing how to help people create “raving fans” out of their mates.

 

Coaching Careers’ Tips For Knowing How to Become a Relationship Coach:

 

Relationship Coach Tip #1: Skills from other coaching careers are transferrable. Use these skills help you and your clients determine where they live emotionally and to what level their needs are being met within the relationship. There are 4 key areas to explore and you need to understand what each is and what they represent in order to have your clients see the matches and mismatches.

 

1.  Certainty                  
2.  Significance
3.  Love/Connection

4.  Variety

 

Relationship Coach Tip #2 How to become a relationship coach means taking this information and helping your clients and their partners do a needs assessment – an in-depth evaluation of behaviors and values.

 

Relationship Coach Tip #3 All coaching careers require commitment.   Have  your clients commit to a 10 day period of creating  a “raving fan” out of their mate – then reverse it.  You can do this by:             
 

  • Coaching your client to make a list of all the things their partner would like them to do (or do differently). 

  • Have your client or clients commit to doing as many of those things as possible within the next ten days.

  • Have them create other ways to pleasantly surprise their mate within the next ten days.

  • Make sure you hold them accountable to their commitment by sharing the progress and the results with you.  

In Determining What is Best For You in The Land of Coaching Careers, Think of How to Become a Relationship Coach Who Brings Magic to Relationships

 

If you can get your clients to follow this ten day challenge, they will experience a powerful transformation in themselves and their relationships.  And you will understand the impact of becoming a relationship coach who creates miracles in people’s partnerships. Coaching careers like this will be hard to keep a secret, and you will find yourself with many clients who are your “raving fans”. 

 

Author:  Colette Seymann

 

Co-Author  Ellen Smith


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How to Become a Dating Coach

 

Doesn’t it sound fun to learn how to become a dating coach? A long time ago, marriages were arranged…you got what you got, and didn’t make a fuss. Now there are so many options, life is going too fast, and people are putting off getting into serious relationships until they are well on their way up the corporate ladder. By the time they are ready to start, they often find it hard to find someone compatible. A lot of my friends have turned to dating services, and of all of them…only one is married. I’m sure these dating services work, but there has to be a better way to weed through all the available singles. Why not coaching?

A few years ago, I had a friend who was single and looking for a bit of romance. He had a steady career, came in contact with a lot of people, but rarely even went on a date. I suggested a haircut change…to actually spend more than $8 and get his hair styled. Within a couple of weeks, he went from 4 months of being “dateless” to having 3 dates! He’s now happily married. I know, it wasn’t just the haircut. But we did have a laugh at the idea of having a business where men can learn how to be “dateable”…his idea was that he always seemed to get noticed by women when he already had a girlfriend. Maybe it was because there was a woman who was making sure he was properly groomed, and someone besides his football watching buddies was helping him pick out clothes to wear. Or maybe because he felt he could just be himself because his need for love and connection was being fulfilled. As a coach, offering some support, encouragement, and strategy, could have provided a world of difference.

Now when I think about how to become a dating coach, I immediately think about the DISC and Values Assessments. With that kind of information, a coach could really make some sparks fly. With the right marketing, you could actually set up a database that would be large enough to even take a stab at connecting people who might be a good fit. But even by helping your clients understand their dating history patterns through their personality styles and values would be of magical value. And, as with any other coaching, you want to be able to lead people out of their existing comfort zones so they can get new results.

So if you really want to learn how to become a dating coach, start with learning how to debrief the DISC and Values Assessments. Then you can provide exceptional value for those who are stressed out by the dating scene, and offer solutions and strategies so they can be on their way to finding their match.

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Accountability Coach

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How to Become a Relationship Coach (An Insiders Perspective)

 

Ever ask yourself how to become a relationship coach?  There is a great need out there, and it’s easier than you might think.  IF you use information from the DISC or Values Assessments.

My husband and I recently went through a relationship assessment debrief.  What was most amazing was that he actually felt that the information was amazingly insightful.  Why was I so surprised? 

Well, it’s because we actually don’t always see eye to eye.  It’s not just because he’s over half a foot taller than I am.  And the assessments told us just why.  You see, he is a very high “S” and very high “C”.  In case you aren’t familiar with the DISC, it means that he is very steady.  He takes awhile to change course and only then if all the data supports that decision.  He is also a little pessimistic.  He didn’t really buy into that part, until he asked an expert.  Our six year old daughter.  She not only told him he was, but was able to give him a very good example.

Ok, before you think that I think I’m perfect…I’ll tell you about myself.  I’m a fairly high “D” and “I”.  I like to get things done (my way),  I’m very social (it takes at least 20 minutes to say goodbye at a party),  and according to the view of a high “S” and “C”…I can be a little Pollyanna.  Too optimistic?  Bah humbug!

No one ever told me how to become a relationship coach, but without those assessments it would have taken an expert at least a month’s worth of sessions to get that much insight.  And the beauty of these tools is that it is objective, clear, and insightful…and you can get the results after a 20 minute quiz.  That’s modern technology! 

But what we really gained out of the assessments and debrief was confirmation of what we already knew.  We may deal with the world in very different ways, but that also can provide quite a bit of balance.  And amazingly we have almost identical values.   The whole process was really valuable, and probably would have been really helpful if we had received it as a wedding gift instead of those champagne glasses we hardly ever use.

So if anyone ever asks you how to become a relationship coach…Now you know.

Colette Seymann

Accountability Coach, JTS Advisors

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