When a new coach is asking me how to become a relationship coach, one question they ask me is, “Do I have to tell a couple to ‘break up’?”  We’ll that’s a simple answer… At times, YES, if you’re going to be worth your life coach salary, you’ll need to advise clients to break off their relationship sometimes.  You may need to learn how to get life coach clients to split up!  When you learn how to become a relationship coach, you’ll realize that you’ll actually need to do that for a variety of reasons.

When you’re thinking of how to become a relationship coach, you need to sacrifice some of the taboos that you may have about relationships.  Do you think that as long as a relationship isn’t abusive that the couple should always stay together and work things out?  Why?  Do you think that being alone is ‘bad’?  When coaching clients are having trouble in relationships, do you always think about how to get life coach clients back together?  Also, perhaps you perceive that any time there is dis-agreement in a relationship that there’s something wrong or someone to blame.

Learning How to Become a Relationship Coach in a Modern World

In modern relationships, people decide on what they’re going to do based upon preference.  Most relationships are no longer ‘arranged’ and most women don’t have to marry a man simply because he has money or power.  That means that many of the old ideas about how relationships work or don’t work have to change along with those circumstances.  Part of how to become a relationship coach is learning how to get life coach clients to make major changes in their ‘relationship expectations’.

How to Get Life Coach Clients to Understand The Game Has Changed

Help your clients to realize that they have a choice.  Learn how to get life coach clients to think of their life without that particular relationship.  It doesn’t mean that they’ve got to break up and that it’s the ‘only choice’ but when your life coaching client stops making that choice ‘wrong’ then they can really feel free to decide which way they REALLY want to go rather than just living in reaction.  Sometimes, you’ll tell a couple to ‘break up’ and then they will actually grow closer together as a result.  Learn how to become a relationship coach that can learn how to get life coach clients to produce that result.  Your coaching clients will actually convince themselves to love each other more when you challenge their relationship.

Jeffrey T. Sooey

CEO, JTS Advisors

Founder, Coaches Training Blog community