I know quick coaching tips are a dime a dozen, but this one is critical (and most coaches miss it).

I was talking to a friend yesterday about how she was struggling to hold on to her intimate relationship.

I asked her “What’s your goal?”, and she said that she wanted to ‘get love’ and ‘have some attention’ from her significant other. 

OUCH

My response: “Then your relationship is already dead.”

Why? 

Because you can’t maintain a strong relationship when your goal is to GET SOMETHING for yourself. A relationship is where you get to GIVE. If GIVING isn’t the goal, the relationship will eventually die.

Then your relationship is already dead.”

The same goes for coaching relationships. You may get paid, or enjoy aspects of the coaching relationship, but if that’s your GOAL for the coaching relationship…

…your coaching will fail (at least in the long term).

GIVING to your client needs to be the focus.

How do you succeed in GIVING to your client? 

The number one skill you need to give powerfully to your client is EMPATHY.

The Skill You Need to Give Powerfully to Your Client = EMPATHY.”

Empathy is the ability to understand, appreciate, and experience your client’s wants, needs, feelings, and world.

When you can EMPATHIZE with your client, GIVING to them is EASY. You’ll always know what to do next to support them and how to reach them.

Without empathy, you’ll devolve into selfish approaches, miss the mark, and eventually turn your client against continued coaching with you. It’s just a matter of time.

#empathymatters #empathycoach #lifecoach

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Jeffrey T. Sooey
CEO, JTS Advisors
Founder, Coaches Training Blog community