When you go through tough times. How do you manage?
Do you avoid?
Do you freak out?
…Do you coach yourself?
Three ‘Life Ruining’ Situations
Recently, I experienced three events that really changed my life – in one day. All three had the potential to ruin my life if I was unable to handle them. I really had to pull all of my tools together and coach myself through them.
The first was a vehicle accident, everyone involved survived, but it was traumatic. I felt like I was watching the scene unfold in a movie.
The second was an unexpected (and hurtful) break down of a long standing relationship.
The third was having to be there for my daughter as she was faced with the hard choice of quitting her job, which she loved so much.
I asked myself,
- “How much can I handle?
- Why is this happening to me?
- How do I get through this?”
…and the answer came to me.
You are a life coach. You have all the tools. You are so fortunate to have these tools. You got this!
So through these times, and they have been trying, I thought I would share with you my thoughts.
As a coach, how often do you coach yourself? You are capable of coaching yourself through anything really.
My integrity was questioned a few weeks back. I said something and didn’t follow through. How could I apply this lesson to these situations? Well, the answer was simple, be accountable. Be a person of integrity. After all, I hold my clients accountable, and as a coach, I should have integrity and be accountable.
Does Life Coaching Work For a Car Accident?
I went through all of my coaching materials, reading through my notes, with one question in mind that I needed to answer. I am accountable for all of my… well, everything. I can’t let these things have negative outcomes. I would never coach a client to do that. I am a conduit for success with my clients. Therefore; I must be a conduit for my own success.
How do I take an accident – something so seemingly out of my control and turn it around so that it can be a positive thing?
I coached myself through that one – easy.
I got this.
How I Coached Myself Through a Bad Breakup
Then the breakdown of a relationship.
Man. That one was a tough one.
I was so heartbroken and I felt so unfairly treated. I was angry, and the trust and love and effort that I put into that relationship… all for nothing.
So how could I move forward from that? Why me? How could that person do that to me?
The same can be said for you, really. You’ve had a breakdown of a relationship, right? Whether it be parental, our husbands or wives, a boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend, teacher, whatever. We have all given more than we received. We have all loved unequally and trusted unequally.
So how would I coach a client through this? I would ask them,
- How can you take this situation and grow from it?
- How can you be a better person in the end?
- How can you succeed through this?
I answered these questions. I spent a good long time thinking about the answers and came up with this:
- I will never be a lesser person because of someone else’s actions.
- I can only be accountable for what I allow, what I tolerate, and what I won’t.
- I love that I am capable of giving unconditionally – even if it’s more, but I won’t allow disrespect in the process.
- It’s a challenge – I love challenges.
- I can succeed through this because I have the tools necessary to coach my clients through this with confidence. So I can coach myself through this.
- I won’t let the breakdown break me. I am stronger than that.
- I create my own happiness. Happiness isn’t something that can be given. It’s mine to make happen.
And through all of these growing and empowering thoughts, I can be an awesome pillar for my daughter. I can be a positive role model for her. I can show her that even though all people aren’t awesome, they all have the potential to be. And I can’t stop believing in that, and I won’t.
This is a huge benefit to being a coach. It’s amazing that, as a coach, you can be successful at something that is so good for the world, so good for people, but so good for YOU at the same time.
However, those great coaching skills are only helpful for you if you pay attention to your own needs and your own life. The thing with accountability and responsibility is that we rarely give ourselves the credit for the good things we do… the amazing achievements we create for ourselves.
As a coach, I honor the milestones and successes of my clients.
I need to do this for myself.
I need to walk the talk.
I have to believe in myself and my gifts and capabilities and reward myself. I need to honor myself.
Does life coaching work?
All I need to do to find out is coach myself.
This is why I love being a coach.
Certified Life Skills Coach, Anger Management Coach, and a Certified Mediator and Negotiator
Season Truax is a Certified Life Skills Coach, Anger Management Coach, and a Certified Mediator and Negotiator. Season writes regularly for her own blog at http://www.your-life-solutions.com/