How to provide massive value during a single coaching session & How you can make people feel they’ve obtained the best coaching from you

Everyone who wants to learn how to become a life coach needs coaching techniques that create value for every coaching session you give. The best coaching techniques involve getting out of your own head and getting into someone else’s head. Specifically when learning how to become a life coach, and really trying to provide massive value for someone, to help them shift…you will need to get into their head.

What does that mean? It means going beyond understanding where someone is coming from, it means understanding them so well that you feel the emotions they are feeling and experiencing the situations WITH them.

What coaching techniques do you need to use to get into someone’s head? Assuming you have rapport with them, you can start by asking them about their goals. Find out which 3 things are most crucial to them to achieve in the next 90 days. This will give you valuable information about where they are, where they want to be, and the vehicles they are using. Are they looking for certainty or variety? Are they looking for love & connection or significance? These are the four basic needs for survival.

Once you know this basic information, you want it to become crystal clear…not only to you, but to your client as well. One of the best coaching techniques is to ask questions. You want to really get clear around what their needs are so you know how to become a life coach for them, especially in their eyes.

What’s important about “x”?

What are your beliefs around “x”?

How does that make you feel? How would that make you feel if you could change that?

What’ stopping you from achieving “x”? How has it stopped you in other areas?

What is failing to change costing you?

What’s important to you in your life?

What are you missing out on in your life?

Note their emotions and see how their emotions get their meaning in the context of what’s important to them. This is one of the most important aspects of learning how to become a life coach.

What if they answer, “I don’t know?” That leads to the next step in our list of coaching techniques… Ask more questions. Change your words to reflect your client’s language more. Mirror back to them in tonality, intensity and speed of language. Or you can assume a more dominant posture and tell them…”you DO know.” And wait for their response. Reassure them that they have the answers and that it is ok for them to take the time and find them.

By now you have a lot of information. Now you KNOW how to become a life coach for your client. You should be in their world. If not…ask more questions for clarity. “Tell me more about…” Listen to their words, and try to feel what they are feeling. Feed it back to them to check and see if you really have it. This takes practice, but when you get it right…it’s magic. When they sense that you really understand, they will either tell you with words, you will hear a shift in their voice, or they may simply sigh. You have given them massive value at this point. You may be the first person who has ever taken the time to really understand them. You have now EXPERIENCED how to become a life coach.

Now you are ready for the next step in coaching techniques…after you have “become” that person, quietly step outside and observe from your vantage point. Offer that perspective to your client, which is now filtered through what’s going on with them. This is another opportunity to give value. If you don’t have answers, ask questions rather than telling them what to do.  The real value you can offer as a coach is to be able to help people find their own path.  Ultimately, your client will choose that path themselves, and you’re only a supporter along the way.

Colette Seymann

Accountability Coach, JTS Advisors