Have you ever thought if of becoming a relationship coach for a family?  It’s not uncommon to be a relationship coach for couples or business partners.  But for the whole family including children, in-laws, parents, aunts and uncles?  It sounds like a daunting task.  But as you think about it, can you imagine all the family gatherings that could be transformed with the help of a relationship coach?  And becoming a relationship coach for the whole family doesn’t mean you need everyone together. The dynamics of the group can usually be changed through one or two people who are willing to make a difference.  What if you coached several key people to become relationship coaches within their own family?  Here are some strategies.

Becoming a Relationship Coach For Families is Worthwhile if you Can Help Your Clients Find Common or Complimentary Goals

Relationship Coach Strategy #1:  Help your clients find common or complimentary goals.

Have you ever noticed how even the most families pull together in times of crisis.  Instead of making 3 or more totally different lives work together, sharing a common goal can also bring more unity.  Why not make a family gathering into a goal?  Becoming a relationship coach can be as simple as having people get together and share which outcomes are most important for the gathering.  Aunt Sara wants to make sure the food is good and Uncle Paul wants to make sure he gets his favorite dessert.  My brother wants to make sure he doesn’t miss the football game.  By identifying which aspects are most important to each person, each person can get at least their top need met.

As You Work With Your Relationship Coach Clients Help Them Find Their Strengths

Relationship Coach Strategy #2:  Work with people’s strengths.

You wouldn’t have grandma move the extra table and chairs up from the basement by herself, but no one wants to interrupt uncle Harry from his beloved football game.  If you plan ahead so he won’t miss out on the game, he might really like to be the hero and do the heavy work.  Instead of having the kids stay out of the way, find ways they can contribute.  Even very young children can make special placecards for the family table, and find great satisfaction when their work is displayed.  Becoming a relationship coach means looking for opportunities.

Becoming a Relationship Coach that Teaches Clients to Respect Others Natural Behavioral Styles Will Benefit Your Clients

Relationship Coach Strategy #3:  Respect people’s natural behavioral styles.

Without running DISC assessments on everyone, there are still ways to identify how to bring out the best in people.  Becoming a relationship coach means communicating effectively with people while respecting their different behaviorial styles.  Some people need a lot of detail, with others they only want to hear the basics.  You don’t want to give orders to the chief, but what do you do with all of those leaders in the group?  Find out which projects they want to head up and let them head up their own teams.  There are people who can respond quickly to changes in pace, and others who will start to get stressed if you move them from one project to another without allowing them to adequately complete the first task.

Becoming a relationship coach for an entire family can be very rewarding.  By teaching your clients some basic relationship coach strategies you can really leverage the benefit you provide to others without having a large conference call.  And the effect of a few people who want to make a difference can be very inspirational.

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Designated Accountability Coach