When you become a life coach you have the opportunity to give others the gift of listening and silence, which is one of the greatest gifts we can give our clients. So many people in the world are seldom truly heard in their life. People long to be heard, and this is one of the special gifts you, as a coach, can bring to the table.
Become a life Coach–Become a Great Listener
One of the core competencies required when you become a life coach, is that you become an active listener. Only the client knows what is best for them and you’re only going to find out by listening. In a coaching session, a coach should only account for 20% of the total words spoken and be listening 80% of the time. However, listening is not a passive skill, it takes work if you want to become a life coach.
Active Listening is The Ability to:
- Focus completely on what the client is saying and not saying.
- Understand the meaning of what is said in the context of the client’s desires.
- Hear the client’s agenda and to have the ability to disregard your agenda for the client.
- Understand the client’s concerns, goals, values and beliefs as well as discern their limiting beliefs.
- Distinguish between the words, tone of voice, and body language vs. what the client is saying.
- Allow the client to vent without judgment in order for the client to be able to move on to their next steps.
The Next Step to The Listening Process is to:
- Mirror back what the client has said to help the client increase and deepen their insight, clarity and understanding of themselves as well as to see a different perspective.
- Reiterate what your client has said so that they feel you really heard them and so that you know that you are both on the same page.
- Reflect back using their language, tone and body language.
- Encourage, accept, explore and reinforce the client’s expression of feelings, perceptions, concerns and beliefs.
- Support the client’s self-expression.
- Integrate and build on the client’s ideas and suggestions.
- Offer challenges to what the client has said to help them see discrepancies in their thinking.
Pit falls to being a good listener
- The main reason why most people are poor listeners is they are so busy mentally planning a response that they miss the other person’s true message. Listener’s minds function at a faster speed than speakers can talk.
- Another reason is the feeling of having to fill the spaces or silences. However, silence can be a powerful tool in the hand of the coach. Remember, it is not your responsibility to fill every vacuum of silence with noise. Give at least 10 full seconds to the client to come up with an answer. Relax and don’t feel like you need to fill in the space. Give them time to absorb the question and reflect. By doing this, you acknowledge that they have the answer within.
If you want to become a life coach it is a must to become a great listener. This is why receiving coaching can be such a unique experience for many people, as it may be the only time during their week or life that someone truly listens to them. Being a good listener can change someone’s life and this is one of the reasons why we want to become life coaches.
Spiritual Growth Coach
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