Nice Life Coaching is Ineffective Life Coaching

What’s nice life coaching? Is it a life coach who is nice? Is it a life coach who helps to create nice lives for their clients? Is it a life coach who does a nice job?

Life Coaching
Life Coaching

Have a Nice Life

When someone says “have a nice life” it is often meant as an insult. It is a sarcastic remark which often means just the opposite. When someone breaks up with a partner, the partner might sarcastically remark” have a nice life.” In reality, they really are wishing them ill!

Are You a Nice Life Coach Who Specializes in Nice Life Coaching?

However, I would assume that it would be good if someone called their life coach “nice.” Or, if they said that their life coach “did a nice job.” Or, it would be positive if they called their coach a “nice life coach.”

But, do you want to be a nice coach? Are nice life coaches the best life coaches? Does being nice help you achieve results and find outcomes for your clients? Does being nice help you attain and retain clients, and reach a desired level of success? Does nice life coaching work?

Be Nice to Your Clients…Sometimes

Of course you have to be nice to all clients… current, past, and potential. That’s one way you get and keep clients. As a business person and a marketer, you have to be nice. It’s best to be polite, charming, positive, gregarious, and honest when selling your services and discussing business. However, as a coach, being nice probably isn’t one of the most important factors for success.

You don’t need to be mean, but as a coach, you are not there to be a friend or someone who agrees with everything your client says and does. You are there to question, challenge, and demand more of your client. You are there to give them an occasional kick in the butt. You are there to make them see the behaviors that limit their success; you are there to uncover obstacles to achieving their goals and dreams. You can’t do all that with nice life coaching!

Be a Life Coach – Not a Foe or a Friend

You are not going to get results if you act like your client’s BFF. You’re not going to get results if you act like a nagging mother. You are also not going to get results if you act like the strict prison warden. Neither friend or foe a life coach be!

What Relationship Does a Life Coach have with Clients?

To help clients achieve their goals, grow, and create action plans to help them reach their dreams, a coach has to have a dynamic and positive relationship with each client. Coaches act in various capacities when coaching clients:

  • As advocates
  • As guidance counselors
  • As sounding boards
  • As an occasional shoulder to cry on (but not too often because that would make you too much of a friend)
  • As mirrors to see behavior and attitudes

Nice life coaching is ineffective life coaching! You can certainly be a nice person and still be a life coach. You can also have a certain level of niceness in your session, but if you focus on being a nice life coach, you will probably not be an effective life coach, and therefore, not a successful one, either!

Give this strategy a try and see for yourself that it works. If you liked this coaching tip, leave a comment or use the handy bookmark buttons below to share it with others on Facebook, Twitter, Digg, etc. Thanks!

Fred Philips
Business Coach
Writing Team, Coaches Training Blog Community

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  1. Ben says

    There’s a difference between a nice life coaching and life coaching, like this article said, life coaches are not there to be your friend. They are there to help you, to be honest with you and to help guide you in life.

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