{"id":29581,"date":"2026-06-10T15:51:58","date_gmt":"2026-06-10T23:51:58","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/?p=29581"},"modified":"2026-06-10T15:52:00","modified_gmt":"2026-06-10T23:52:00","slug":"why-do-your-clients-go-against-their-own-beliefs","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/why-do-your-clients-go-against-their-own-beliefs\/","title":{"rendered":"Why do your clients ‘go against’ their own beliefs?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

By definition, all clients follow their ‘aggregate beliefs’. The reason it sometimes doesn’t look like it is that clients have conflicting beliefs, so they can operate contrary to some of their beliefs in order to follow whatever other beliefs drive them in the moment. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

Clients will also swap the belief they ‘follow’ moment to moment depending on their state of mind.  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Each state of mind is orchestrated by a belief, but is locked into a set of physiological and representational nervous system patterns (fancy terms for “body use” and “self talk”) that may override any belief temporarily.  When the mood changes, the belief they follow may also change. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is why clients may defy their beliefs temporarily because they ‘felt differently’ in the moment… casting their purported rule book aside in exchange for an emotional mandate.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Bottom line is that your client’s beliefs conduct the symphony, but they don’t write the music, and they don’t make the sounds.  Belief is a powerful force, but other more powerful forces are running the show.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I find that when a client transforms, they change their emotions FIRST, and then the beliefs follow (sometimes, literally months or years later). <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes, just discussing the beliefs (and their consequences) can trigger this emotional change (still before the belief itself has changed, at least consciously).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

HERE’S an interactive simulations to experience the multifactorial impact of these inputs on the complex system that is “human behavioral state”:<\/p>\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\n\nBelief vs. Emotion Behavioral Simulator<\/title>\n<style>\n body {\n font-family: system-ui, -apple-system, sans-serif;\n background-color: #f9fafb;\n color: #1f2937;\n display: flex;\n flex-direction: column;\n align-items: center;\n padding: 2rem;\n }\n .container {\n background: white;\n padding: 2rem;\n border-radius: 12px;\n box-shadow: 0 4px 6px -1px rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.1);\n max-width: 600px;\n width: 100%;\n }\n .controls {\n display: grid;\n grid-template-columns: 1fr 1fr;\n gap: 1.5rem;\n margin-bottom: 2rem;\n }\n .control-group {\n display: flex;\n flex-direction: column;\n gap: 0.5rem;\n }\n label {\n font-weight: 600;\n font-size: 0.9rem;\n }\n select, input[type=\"range\"] {\n width: 100%;\n padding: 0.5rem;\n }\n .simulation-area {\n position: relative;\n width: 100%;\n height: 300px;\n background: #f3f4f6;\n border: 2px dashed #d1d5db;\n border-radius: 8px;\n overflow: hidden;\n }\n .center-mark {\n position: absolute;\n top: 50%;\n left: 50%;\n transform: translate(-50%, -50%);\n width: 10px;\n height: 10px;\n background: #9ca3af;\n border-radius: 50%;\n }\n .client-dot {\n position: absolute;\n top: 50%;\n left: 50%;\n width: 24px;\n height: 24px;\n background: #2563eb;\n border-radius: 50%;\n transform: translate(-50%, -50%);\n transition: all 0.4s cubic-bezier(0.4, 0, 0.2, 1);\n box-shadow: 0 2px 4px rgba(37, 99, 235, 0.4);\n }\n .status {\n margin-top: 1.5rem;\n padding: 1rem;\n background: #eff6ff;\n border-radius: 8px;\n text-align: center;\n font-weight: 500;\n }\n @media (max-width: 500px) {\n .controls { grid-template-columns: 1fr; }\n }\n<\/style>\n<\/head>\n<body>\n\n<div class=\"container\">\n <h2 style=\"text-align: center; margin-top: 0;\">Behavioral Simulator<\/h2>\n \n <div class=\"controls\">\n <div class=\"control-group\">\n <label for=\"emotion\">Current Emotional Mandate<\/label>\n <select id=\"emotion\">\n <option value=\"calm\">Calm \/ Neutral<\/option>\n <option value=\"fear\">Fear \/ Anxiety<\/option>\n <option value=\"confidence\">High Confidence<\/option>\n <option value=\"frustration\">Frustration<\/option>\n <\/select>\n <\/div>\n \n <div class=\"control-group\">\n <label for=\"intensity\">Emotional Intensity<\/label>\n <input type=\"range\" id=\"intensity\" min=\"0\" max=\"100\" value=\"0\">\n <\/div>\n\n <div class=\"control-group\">\n <label for=\"belief1\">Belief: Capable vs. Unchangeable<\/label>\n <input type=\"range\" id=\"belief1\" min=\"-50\" max=\"50\" value=\"0\">\n <small style=\"display: flex; justify-content: space-between; font-size: 0.75rem; color: #6b7280;\">\n <span>Unchangeable<\/span><span>Capable<\/span>\n <\/small>\n <\/div>\n\n <div class=\"control-group\">\n <label for=\"belief2\">Belief: Deserving vs. Undeserving<\/label>\n <input type=\"range\" id=\"belief2\" min=\"-50\" max=\"50\" value=\"0\">\n <small style=\"display: flex; justify-content: space-between; font-size: 0.75rem; color: #6b7280;\">\n <span>Undeserving<\/span><span>Deserving<\/span>\n <\/small>\n <\/div>\n <\/div>\n\n <div class=\"simulation-area\">\n <div class=\"center-mark\"><\/div>\n <div class=\"client-dot\" id=\"dot\"><\/div>\n <\/div>\n\n <div class=\"status\" id=\"status-text\">\n Client is aligned with their aggregate beliefs.\n <\/div>\n<\/div>\n\n<script>\n const dot = document.getElementById('dot');\n const emotionSelect = document.getElementById('emotion');\n const intensitySlider = document.getElementById('intensity');\n const belief1Slider = document.getElementById('belief1');\n const belief2Slider = document.getElementById('belief2');\n const statusText = document.getElementById('status-text');\n\n function updateSimulation() {\n const emotion = emotionSelect.value;\n const intensity = parseInt(intensitySlider.value);\n const b1 = parseInt(belief1Slider.value);\n const b2 = parseInt(belief2Slider.value);\n\n \/\/ Base position determined by aggregate beliefs (The Symphony)\n let x = 50 + b1 * 0.6; \n let y = 50 - b2 * 0.6;\n\n \/\/ Emotional Override (The Mandate)\n let emotionalPullX = 0;\n let emotionalPullY = 0;\n\n if (intensity > 0) {\n switch(emotion) {\n case 'fear':\n emotionalPullX = -45;\n emotionalPullY = 45;\n break;\n case 'confidence':\n emotionalPullX = 45;\n emotionalPullY = -45;\n break;\n case 'frustration':\n emotionalPullX = 45;\n emotionalPullY = 45;\n break;\n case 'calm':\n emotionalPullX = (50 - x) * 0.3;\n emotionalPullY = (50 - y) * 0.3;\n break;\n }\n }\n\n \/\/ Apply intensity weight to the emotional pull\n const weight = intensity \/ 100;\n x = x + (emotionalPullX * weight);\n y = y + (emotionalPullY * weight);\n\n \/\/ Keep within bounds\n x = Math.max(5, Math.min(95, x));\n y = Math.max(5, Math.min(95, y));\n\n dot.style.left = x + '%';\n dot.style.top = y + '%';\n\n \/\/ Update status text\n if (intensity > 60 && emotion !== 'calm') {\n statusText.innerText = `Temporary Defiance: The emotional mandate of ${emotion} is overriding core beliefs.`;\n statusText.style.color = '#b91c1c';\n statusText.style.backgroundColor = '#fef2f2';\n dot.style.background = '#ef4444';\n dot.style.boxShadow = '0 2px 8px rgba(239, 68, 68, 0.5)';\n } else if (Math.abs(b1) > 30 || Math.abs(b2) > 30) {\n statusText.innerText = `Stable State: Client's behavior is anchored by strong aggregate beliefs.`;\n statusText.style.color = '#15803d';\n statusText.style.backgroundColor = '#f0fdf4';\n dot.style.background = '#22c55e';\n dot.style.boxShadow = '0 2px 8px rgba(34, 197, 94, 0.5)';\n } else {\n statusText.innerText = `Neutral State: Behavior is malleable and susceptible to new beliefs or emotions.`;\n statusText.style.color = '#374151';\n statusText.style.backgroundColor = '#f3f4f6';\n dot.style.background = '#2563eb';\n dot.style.boxShadow = '0 2px 8px rgba(37, 99, 235, 0.5)';\n }\n }\n\n \/\/ Event Listeners\n emotionSelect.addEventListener('change', updateSimulation);\n intensitySlider.addEventListener('input', updateSimulation);\n belief1Slider.addEventListener('input', updateSimulation);\n belief2Slider.addEventListener('input', updateSimulation);\n\n \/\/ Initial render\n updateSimulation();\n<\/script>\n\n<\/body>\n<\/html>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By definition, all clients follow their ‘aggregate beliefs’. The reason it sometimes doesn’t look like it is that clients have conflicting beliefs, so they can operate contrary to some of their beliefs in order to follow whatever other beliefs drive them in the moment.  Clients will also swap the belief they ‘follow’ moment to moment […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":29582,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[258,210],"tags":[2541,995],"class_list":["post-29581","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-mindset-coaching","category-psychology-coaching","tag-coaching-mindset","tag-psychology-coaching","entry"],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-content\/uploads\/2026\/06\/ChatGPT-Image-Jun-10-2026-07_02_38-PM.png","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29581","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=29581"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29581\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":29583,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/29581\/revisions\/29583"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/29582"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=29581"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=29581"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=29581"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}