{"id":28103,"date":"2022-09-17T22:59:46","date_gmt":"2022-09-18T06:59:46","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/?p=28103"},"modified":"2023-01-19T08:55:53","modified_gmt":"2023-01-19T16:55:53","slug":"the-esteemed-coach","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/coachestrainingblog.com\/becomeacoach\/the-esteemed-coach\/","title":{"rendered":"The Esteemed Coach"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Have you ever thought a potential client really liked you<\/span>\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and then they just disappeared<\/span>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Me too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Despite trying to win the \u201cmost likable coach on the planet\u201d award\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"Kris<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u2026it didn\u2019t stop clients from \u201cghosting\u201d me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I felt like clients were lying to me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If they didn\u2019t want me to coach them, why didn\u2019t they just say so?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But after years of suffering<\/span> through more and more of this, I learned\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026It\u2019s NOT enough<\/span> to be liked<\/span>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most coach training dwells on getting clients to \u2018like you\u2019<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example, a well known training teaches you to say \u201cThere seems to be <\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

some fear.\u201d<\/em><\/strong>…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026instead of \u201cWhy are you afraid?\u201d<\/em><\/strong>, to avoid your client disliking your tone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But all that \u2018please like me\u2019 hand wringing doesn\u2019t help coaches much.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can be liked<\/span> and STILL be dismissed<\/span> or ignored<\/span>.<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Clients liking you doesn\u2019t mean that they have ESTEEM for you<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Clients liking you doesn\u2019t mean that they have ESTEEM for you<\/span>.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Personal growth centers around \u201cself-esteem\u201d…<\/p>\n\n\n\n

…important for sure\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026but that\u2019s not<\/span> the kind of esteem I\u2019m talking about.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m talking about your potential client holding YOU in high esteem<\/span>\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026respecting<\/span>, admiring<\/span>, and \u2018looking up\u2019 to you<\/span>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

But why does your potential client having esteem for you matter<\/span>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

ESTEEM can make the difference in enrolling<\/span> a potential <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

client.<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Potential clients who LIKE YOU might ask you \u201cas a friend\u201d for FREE advice\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026but they don\u2019t become PAYING clients<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Potential clients become paying clients<\/span> when they have ESTEEM for<\/span> <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

you<\/span>.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Would you rather be the \u201cfriend\u201d who everyone LIKES, but nobody PAYS\u2026?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026or the esteemed coach<\/span>, whose client\u2019s PAY to hear your coaching?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The last time I wrote to you I revealed 5 tests that clients use on coaches <\/strong><\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

and how to pass them<\/strong><\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Most clients do test you from time to time\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026but clients with ESTEEM for you will \u201ctest you\u201d less often.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/a><\/figure>
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(NOTE: If you want to learn how to start your own coaching business, then check out this webinar<\/a><\/strong>, called “How to Start Your Coaching Business in 30 Days<\/a>“<\/a><\/strong> \u00a0During the webinar, I\u2019ll cover how to get your first paid clients fast and make it feel natural for you. Click HERE now<\/a><\/strong> to attend the webinar<\/a><\/strong>.)<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n

How do you cause your coaching clients to hold you in <\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

high esteem?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019ve got to signal success BEFORE you meet potential clients<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Potential clients make decisions about you with their eyes and ears <\/p>\n\n\n\n

INSTANTLY.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you signal \u201csuccess\u201d, then they will start off thinking you\u2019re worthy of<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

esteem<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No, this doesn\u2019t mean to go out and rent a lamborghini and have a <\/p>\n\n\n\n

photoshoot.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You can trigger esteem from potential clients in much more subtle ways<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here are 7 \u2018esteem triggers\u2019 to use BEFORE you engage potential <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

clients:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

1. Find a \u201crole model\u201d<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

My coach assigned me to watch all the James Bond movies so I could model<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

the confidence that character has<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

No matter what happens to James Bond\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026he\u2019s going to find a way to reach his goal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"007<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

After my \u2018bond binge\u2019, my coach told me that my voice got deeper and my<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

confidence exploded<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Dean of Master Coach University, Jeffrey Sooey, used to match the<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

tempo and tone of charismatic speakers<\/span> like Jim Rohn and Martin Luther <\/p>\n\n\n\n

King.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"MLK<\/a><\/figure>\n\n\n\n

He told me about hours he spent practicing scenes to match a charismatic<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

actor’s portrayal<\/span> like Tom Cruise in some of his iconic movie scenes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Another example: One of my clients put a photo of Linda Hamilton (from the <\/p>\n\n\n\n

movie \u201cTerminator\u201d) in her office to remind her to be strong and assertive<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

One way to model someone<\/span> is to ask yourself this question when you start <\/p>\n\n\n\n

your day:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow would [the person you model] approach today?\u201d<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Then go through your day with that state of mind<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Be humble<\/span>:<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019re not a \u201cperfect\u201d coach and neither is any other coach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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You\u2019re not a \u201cperfect\u201d coach and neither is any other coach.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re not humble, you can\u2019t coach<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because your job as the coach is to face down the \u2018black box\u2019 and uncertainty<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

of your client\u2019s deepest limitations and issues\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and come out delivering transformation and empowerment<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s humbling work!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s uncomfortable<\/span> and confusing<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And there\u2019s no \u2018right answer\u2019<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Arrogant<\/span> coaches tend to isolate themselves and criticize others<\/span>\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026because they’re searching for perfection<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

They haven\u2019t developed enough humility to let go of being \u201cright\u201d, or look good <\/p>\n\n\n\n

all the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Righteousness stops too many coaches from helping clients because <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

they\u2019re afraid to make a mistake or look bad<\/span> to the client.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

As a result of this fear, arrogant coaches sit alone daydreaming about being <\/p>\n\n\n\n

perfect\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026instead of coaching clients.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Humble coaches risk criticism and mistakes<\/span>\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026so they can change the lives of their clients.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

If you\u2019re not humble, you\u2019ll reject all that discomfort and uncertainty<\/span>\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026which makes it impossible to change your client\u2019s life<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The discomfort of coaching is a test<\/span>\u2026<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and only the humble coach<\/span> can pass it.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don\u2019t have to be right<\/span> all the time.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You don\u2019t have to know all the answers<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You WILL make mistakes<\/span>\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026that\u2019s how we LEARN the answers<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you\u2019re playing a \u201cbig game\u201d as a coach\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026you WILL be criticized<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026you WILL be wrong<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and you WON\u2019T always look good.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That\u2019s ok, as long as you\u2019re leading your clients forward.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You\u2019ll powerfully bring your client to their destination if you humbly accept<\/span> <\/p>\n\n\n\n

imperfections<\/span>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Humility allows you to make mistakes\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026learn from them\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u2026and become a better coach.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Humility allows you to make mistakes\u2026learn from them\u2026and become a better coach.”<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

3. Take care of your health<\/span> and appearance<\/span>.<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

I struggled for years with carrying a few extra pounds.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But recently I got serious about my health and appearance.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As a result:<\/p>\n\n\n\n