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Becoming a Life Coach… A Story About Winning

December 25, 2008 By 2 Comments

 

When I think about becoming a life coach, I think about my high school cross country and track coach, David. At that time, I wanted to become a coach like him…although the thought of coaching the regular PE classes and teaching remedial math did not appeal to me. I could tell those aspects of his job probably made him want to pull out his hair, because it was obvious to me that his passion was coaching.

 

When I wrote about the subject, “What is a Life Coach?, in a previous article, I wrote about 5 different types of coaches. When I think about which category David would have best fit in…I keep coming back up to the “guru”. At least David was the guru in our world. Of course he told us how far to run, gave us track workouts, encouraged us… he taught us about visualization and the power of a positive attitude. That was cutting edge stuff in the early ‘80’s. But it’s still hard to describe what made David such a great coach. And thinking back, I don’t really think it was WHAT David DID. It was WHO David WAS. He was a man of few words. I don’t remember any motivational speeches that were more than 5 words, yet somehow he conveyed his belief in us. I don’t think our team ever won a major state meet, but he instilled in us something even more powerful about becoming a life coach that has stayed with me.

 

David taught me the concept of being unstoppable. Although he taught us in a very understated style. I never saw David get upset, and in fact I think some kids must have walked all over him. He was far from an accountability coaching style, but David instilled such confidence in us that we didn’t think about quitting. I remember a team training trip in the mountains of Arizona. On the last day, we made a deal with our coach. If we completed the 8 mile run under a certain time, David would buy us pizza for dinner that night. If we didn’t, we would buy him pizza. 

 

We set out, feeling confident. The mountains of Arizona are known for afternoon thunderstorms. Usually, just enough rain to settle the dust. Not this afternoon. Not far into the run, the rain became a torrential downpour. As we ran along the dirt logging road, the water mixed with the dirt and became clay-like. Each time our foot hit the ground, it would sink into the mud. Each time we picked up our feet, we would also pick up about 2 pounds of clay that had stuck to the bottom of our shoes. Needless to say, we were off pace. Our coach drove along side us and told us to get into the truck. David was taking us out to pizza anyway for our good effort. 

 

Several times he tried to get us to quit, several times we refused. We had made a commitment, and we were NOT going to quit…not if it rained, not if we could barely get our feet out of the mud…in that moment we were being unstoppable in our goal. Which of course, we didn’t make. But that was not the point. We happily shared our pizza with David, and then he took us out for an ice cream. In our own way, we had won.

 

Becoming a life coach is about winning no matter what.  Your clients are usually achievers.  They don’t know how special and great they are.  When someone like David helps you tap into the unstoppable part of you, no matter the outcome, you experience what it is to be a winner.  That’s what becoming a life coach is all about.

 

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Accountability Coach

 

P.S.  Whether you are experienced or you are just becoming a life coach, as you finish up this year, think about the areas where, even if you didn’t produce the result you wanted, you were unstoppable, and acknowledge yourself for being a winner in that area.  Do the same thing with your clients.  If you can think of just one area for you OR for a client of yours, share them with us in the comments below.  We’d love to hear them!  

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What to Look for in a Career Coach Training Program

December 24, 2008 By 1 Comment

 

How do you find a career coach training program that will help you become a world class coach? First of all, you will need to know your strengths and weaknesses. Find out if the program you are interested in does any type ofassessments, such as the DISC or Values assessments. The results will give your coaches insight about you, and may also help you define which type of coaching you will be most naturally most adept.

 

In addition to weekly training sessions, your career coach training program should also include one-on-one mentoring with a master coach. Your coach will help you define and reach your goals, as well as help you tackle obstacles that come up in your path of expanding your identity and help you get results.

 

Peer coaching is another powerful aspect of a career coach training program. Rarely can we get raw feedback from our clients, let alone peers who know what to expect from a coaching session. Coaching 3-5 peers on a weekly basis with honest scoring and feedback will not only help you improve your skills, but will help you own your ability to be an outstanding coach. And since coaching is all about results, you will need to be coaching your peers for about 2 months to make sure there is enough time to see your clients get results.

 

What about sales and marketing training? Many coaches shudder at the thought of having to do sales and marketing. But, how are you going to be a world class coach unless you have clients? Even if you have a background in sales and marketing, make sure yourcareer coach training program offers the basics as well as the cutting edge material you will need to keep your coaching schedule as full as you want. And if nothing else, you will have the tools to master this at some level until you can hire someone else to do it for you.

 

Selecting the right career coaches training program will help you become a world-class coach, and become a leader to help others fulfill their destinies.

 

Colette Seymann
JTS Advisors Accountability Coach
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What is a Life Coach?

December 24, 2008 By Leave a Comment

 

When someone asks, “What is a Life Coach?”, what’s the usual answer? As coaches we help our clients achieve specific, measurable results. Through an ongoing coaching relationship, clients learn how to produce extraordinary results in their lives, careers, and businesses. We help people improve their performance and quality of their life.

 

But more specifically, what IS a life coach? Here are five different types of coaches. Which are you?

 

  • Consultant – The consultant provides advice or information that the client doesn’t already know. AND they provide it in a way that the client can put it to use toward achieving their goals.

     

  • Guru – The guru provides confidence. The guru is in the public eye, has a following, and others look up to them. They have a lot of social status, so when they give advice, people take it. They know it’s going to help them, because the advice came from the guru.

     

  • Friend – This type of coach is able to listen, provide empathy, and be a sounding block for the client.

     

  • Strategist – These are the coaches who are great at providing planning and time management. They may not have all the details, but if you bring them the information, they’ll help you turn it into an effective plan.

     

  • Leader – These coaches provide accountability and tough love. They make sure that you do what you need to do, to get the results you want.

 

All these coaching styles provide value, but most people are best at 1-3 of these. And the good news is, you don’t have to be everything to everyone. Focus on which styles are most in line with your personality. Force yourself to narrow it down, and focus your marketing and sales delivery in a way that people will know what to expect and how you are going to deliver results. Now, when you are asked, “What is a life coach?” you can share it way that will paint a more detailed picture of what you have to offer.

 

Colette Seymann

JTS Advisors Accountability Coach

 

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Leadership Training and Coaching Changes the World

December 22, 2008 By 1 Comment

When you first hear about leadership training and coaching, you can have many different reactions, but the truth is that it can, does, and will continue to change the world.  As human beings, our biggest barriers to change are fears, frustrations, lack of skills, and lack of knowledge.  We are fallible, but that doesn’t mean change and progress isn’t possible.  The best people to help individuals and groups make these kinds of changes are COACHES.  Leadership training and coaching will provide this kind of progress for much of the industrialized world and perhaps soon… humanity.

Here’s an example of how leadership training and coaching could impact major issues in the world today.  Let’s assume that coaching can help someone break through fear or frustration.  Do you think there is fear causing some of the financial crisis and recession that’s impacting much of the world today?  Absolutely!  People are AFRAID of stocks going down and so they sell (sending those same stocks down further), which brings more sellers because they are now getting scared as well.  Fear causes people to not purchase as much and so corporate profits go down as well, driving the economy lower.  Fear is not, by any means, the only cause of these market moves, but it is a major contributor to the intensity of the problem.  Coaching can turn that fear around and thus literally change the course of our financial history.

Let’s look at another example… is there some FRUSTRATION right now driving the relationships between, let’s say, India and Pakistan, or possibly Israel and other Arab nations?  Absolutely.  Can you imagine what kind of miracles that leadership training and coaching could bring to those relationships?  We are talking about effects that could literally save lives.

In many other examples I believe that leadership training and coaching can impact situations where lives are on the line.  It is our responsibility as coaches and leaders to keep putting one foot in front of the other on our leadership journey to provide the ultimate contribution to humanity.  We may not be able to ‘bend the course of history’ alone, but combined together, each of our individual actions can change the world with coaching skills.

Jeffrey T. Sooey

CEO, JTS Advisors

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Leadership Training and Coaching… How Can it Get Me to the Next Level?

December 20, 2008 By 1 Comment

 

Leadership training and coaching programs provide people with training in the areas of commitment, leadership, and communication skills, as well as the practical coaching for putting them into effective practice. As leaders, we must go first. As leaders, we are watched and judged. Are we following through with our own commitments, or are we merely telling others what to do? As leaders, if we are inconsistent with our commitments, coaching can support and reinforce us in our commitment.

 

The foundation for leadership training and coaching begins with integrity. Without integrity, there is no solid structure to build upon. Integrity is being and doing our word. Integrity is putting our word above everything else, and operating from the perspective that our word is our most valued possession. By being who we say we are, even when it may not be “appropriate” or convenient, allows others to be who they say they are as well. When we do what we say we will do, and to the best of our ability, we encourage others to do the same.

 

Being in integrity also means being in complete communication and saying what needs to be said. But the attitude of committed leadership is always combined with caring. It includes noticing how others hear who we are, their expectations, and communicating to help them revise their expectations of us in an empowering context. Leadership training and coaching can also help improve these skills.

 

Once we have a commanding attitude over our circumstances, and live our lives in integrity, we have control over our destiny. Instead of being someone whose problems control them, we are seen as someone who is a master over their environment. When people see us operating from a foundation of integrity, then they can rely on us. We pull the team together, and we are unstoppable.

 

But how do we get there? The basics of leadership training and coaching include:

  1. Getting clarity on what you want, and help you minimize efforts that are not getting you closer to your goal.
  2. Assess where we are. Whenever we are not getting the results we want, it is because we are not being someone who could achieve that. This problem stems from our beliefs. Our beliefs determine our actions, and our actions determine our results. We need to decide who we need to be to achieve the results we want.
  3. Do what we need to do, for as long as we need to do it, until we get the results we want. That is, be our word, and be unstoppable in our efforts.

 

Colette Seymann
JTS Advisors Accountability Coach

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Coaching Skills Series: The JOLT Technique

December 19, 2008 By 3 Comments

There are many coaching schools that teach concepts of integrity and accountability. In fact many coaching schools teach coaching skills that help you to become a coach that knows WHAT to do to become more fullfilled, powerful, and successful.

 

However, the biggest problem I find with new coaches that are trying to build a coaching practice (especially the ones that I meet in my coaches training) is not knowing what to do, but rather getting clients to DO what they ALREADY KNOW TO DO.

 

I’m going to show you my secret weapon that played a major part in my going from living in a trailer (broke) to having a growing coaching business that makes over 30,000 a month. It’s something that you can put to work for you starting today.

This ‘Magic Bullet’ is called the JOLT Technique. 

 

Now first of all, why use this technique?

 

People talk about their problems, and talk about the things they want to change or do, and they don’t take any real action. So the jolt technique is meant to change all that. It’s meant to really interrupt the whole habitual pattern of your client.

 

There are actually a couple steps to this technique:

1. I like to call this step… the “me too” part: 

 

It’s really a matter of building rapport with your client. You have to have rapport before you go in and “jolt” your client a little bit. You can’t just jump in and “jolt” your client and expect them to change. They’re not going to like that very much. You have to have the rapport, you have to have the relationship first.

 

Your client might be sharing a little bit about their problem AND YOU WANT TO LISTEN. You want to listen as much as you can during this section of the technique,

 

…and then you want to compliment them. You want to commend them for something, you want to acknowledge them.

 

So you might say something like “You know sally, I really want to acknowledge you and commend you for your honesty in this area because most people aren’t even honest about what their problems and challenges really are, and with honesty you can do so much, you can do anything. Now let me ask you a question, what has allowed you to be so honest about this, to have so much strength when it comes to this challenging problem for you?”

 

What did I just do? I did three little steps in that little compliment.

 

First, I stated what I appreciated, her honesty.

 

Second, I used the word “BECAUSE”, which is really key, you want to use the word “BECAUSE”. Why? BECAUSE… it’s an internal trigger in the mind of your client that makes them listen and believe what you are saying, not to mention that it helps transition into justifying why you stated the compliment. I justified why I was actually complimenting her because I want Sally to BELIEVE what I am saying and allow the compliment to resonate deeply with her. And then…

 

Third, I asked her a question about what I was complimenting her on, which shows a level of INTEREST. When you do this, you are going to have a deep level of rapport and you are going to have an identification, what I call a “me too” with your client.

2. The next section of the “JOLT” technique is the HONESTY portion:

 

You really need to tell them whatever it is that is on your mind, whatever you’re really thinking.

 

You want to use the very same words that are going through your head and you don’t want to edit anything here. You want to be really straight.

 

So in this section, I might say something like, “You know sally, as I said before I really commend you for your honesty. There are a couple things I see. First of all, your life’s a MESS and you’re treating your family really badly, you’re being a JERK to them. Beyond that, there’s so many things you can do to make changes in your business and you’re not doing anything. I mean… it really looks to me like you’re being LAZY.”

 

Remember, during this section, you’re going to say some things that most people DON’T WANT TO HEAR.

 

You create repore in the first section and now you’re breaking repore in this section. You’re telling them honestly exactly what you see, and that’s part of the jolt. You’re giving them an intense enough jolt to start to jar them from their habitual pattern.

 

This is very counterintuitive! You’re going to say some things during this part of the technique that you would never want to say to somebody, or you’ll try to soften it, edit it, or you’ll try to make it a little friendlier .

 

YOU DON’T WANT TO DO THAT!

 

The whole idea of this technique is that it ends with the INTENSE JOLT! You want to wrap up the statement with whatever it is that you could say that has the most teeth, that is the most challenging statement.

 

So maybe I might wrap this statement up with, “You know sally, you really seem like you’re a lazy jerk that’s just thinking about herself.”

 

So something like that is going to start to jolt somebody out of their habitual patterns , and they’re usually all ears because they are thinking, “Now, wait a second, this is something new, I haven’t heard anyone say this to me before, I might need to listen closely.”

 

That’s getting a really key response from your client.

3. Now lets go to step three in the jolt technique, and that’s what I call PAIN & PLEASURE:

 

Now that you jolted them, they’re listening but that doesn’t mean they are going to change anything. Now you’ve just got their attention, you want to get back in rapport a bit and you need to help them to associate massive PAIN to staying where they are… massive PAIN to keeping things the same, and massive PLEASURE to whatever change that they need to make. The best and most powerful way to use this during jolt technique, is to start asking them some questions again, open it up.

 

So you might ask some questions like, “Let me ask you, Sally, how does it feel to know that things aren’t going well with your family? How does it feel to know that you aren’t making any money in your business? How would you feel if it kept going the way it’s been going? How would it feel if this kept going this way for a year? If it got worse, and you don’t change anything, how will it be in five years? Where will you be? Where will you be financially?Where will you be in your relationships? Where would you be in terms of how you feel about yourself?”

 

When they answer, you want to listen for the emotions. If they just say, “Gee, I guess it would be bad” you want to help them to amplify those emotions.

 

Give them some clues… You want to help them, “Would it be bad? Would you feel really depressed? Would you be resentful? Would you be frustrated? Would you be angry? I mean really honestly, tell me, how would you really feel.”

 

Have them really imagine those feelings, feel them, and share them with you.

 

Then you want to take them into the PLEASURE.

 

For example, you could say, “Look, if you change this and you stepped up, and started really taking care of your family and you really started getting off your butt and doing the work you know you got to do… And you start doing that for a couple of months, even if you didn’t get a lot of results, how would you feel? Would you feel more proud? Would you feel more confident? What about after a year, when you start getting some results for this, how would you feel then? What about after five years, where would you be? Where would you be financially? Where would you be with your family? How would that feel? Would you feel happy? Would you feel fulfilled? Would you feel grateful? How would you feel?”

 

Now as they share that with you, they are going to start to associate PAIN to not changing and PLEASURE to changing and that’s going to start creating that change. If you can get them feeling a lot of pain about not changing and a lot of pleasure about changing, then they are ready to go to the final step in this “JOLT” technique…

4. You want to have them immediatly commit to an action.

 

Get them to commit to one major action, maybe a couple major actions that they are going to take as soon as they hang up the phone with you, or as soon as they leave your office. Have them write it down (you write it down as well, so you can hold them accountable later) and then they need to go take those actions IMMEDIATELY.

 

So let’s review this jolt technique one more time:

 

The first step is that repore step, the “me too” step.

 

The second step, HONESTY and the INTENSE JOLT.

 

The third step is that PAIN and PLEASURE piece, you want them to associate pleasure to changing and pain to not changing.

 

And fourth, the ACTION step. Get them into action. Get them going out there and doing something about the motivation that they’ve gotten from that session.

 

This is a simple formula that we teach in our coaches training, but the good news is that as coaching skills go, it’s a simple one.

 

So, go out there and become a coach that JOLTS your clients and sets them on the path to greatness!

 

Jeffrey T. Sooey

CEO, JTS Advisors

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